


dark clouds

by skattermilk



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-02-27
Packaged: 2019-11-06 13:47:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17940866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skattermilk/pseuds/skattermilk
Summary: “On play, In The Car Running Towards The Dark Clouds by Mot.”Mot (못) - 먹구름을 향해 달리는 차 안에서 ▶ youtu.be/RIcspWLIkSQ





	dark clouds

**Author's Note:**

> Serving you the (not so) first angsty lil sheeds from Aska. To be noted, English is not my mother language, so, kindly please excuse me in case you bump into any grammatical errors. It might not be the same with the lyrics and all but I grasp something from the song and write it in another way.. you know what I mean right lol.
> 
> That's it. Sit back, quiet yourself, enjoy the ride, I guess.
> 
> p.s: it's a mess, I know, but please don't hate me okay.

 

“Do I really have the honor to play my favorite song?”

“Of course! We’ve got the chance to play mine last time, right? So, please, have at it.”

“This is the song that somehow, I can relate for like, most of the time. Almost.”

“Ah, is that so? Why, if I may know?”

The guy who is wearing the black headphone offers a smile before he replies, “There are times when I’m so afraid, but I can’t just simply quit..” he trails, the smile is still here. “So instead of backing myself off and quit, I run towards it even though I’m so scared, and I’ll hold onto something, or someone that happens to be with me at that exact moment.”

“That sounds deep, guess I can relate to the such situation as well.. Now that just makes me more curious about the song,” the older guy reaches out a hand of his, asking to the younger to go ahead.

The younger leans in, smiling wide as if he just swallowed the whole sun, beaming as he says, “On play, In The Car Running Towards The Dark Clouds by Mot.”

 

 

It was actually another great time Kihyun had spent that day. He was able to send some of his money to his parents in the morning. Though his mother happened to get mad at him and his idea about sending his whole very first salary, but then it was settled to send half of it after a short argument. Not to forget mentioning that he was hanging out with some old friends of his right after. He was happy, and he still is. Nice weather, good vibes, lovely people and surroundings, Kihyun couldn’t be more thankful than having such a great day.

“It’s been awhile, yeah, dear self?” He hears himself mumble almost in an audible tone, talking to himself with a smile that hasn’t disappeared from his face after sending his friends, Hoseok and Jooheon, off.

The smile slowly fades as his gaze catches a can of cola in the table he was having with his old friends few moments ago. Kihyun heaves a sigh as he reach out a hand of his to take the cola. He lets his thumb rubbing the can randomly, letting his mind wanders around, letting the memory of cola itself leads his mind to a very familiar face that he can picture it so well in his head.

His shoulders are slightly dropped as he sighs, about to excuse himself from the café as well, until someone pulled him into a hug by an arm, wrapped around his shoulder from aside.

The next thing Kihyun hears is a “Yah!” that sounds disappointed and mad in between, but still bright and cheerful enough for his liking. “You were going to leave? For real?”

Kihyun turns himself to see the person who owns that familiar voice. He stays still, looking at the pouty guy who’s now frowning and slightly pouting.

“You told me you can’t make it.”

“I _did_ mean it, though not really. Came straight from work and here I am.” The guy beams, his gaze flies outside in the next blink. “The sun starts to hide so the sky looks dark.”

“Minhyuk,”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to, really.”

“But I really want to, so let me. Now are we going to stay here or shall we go to your place instead? Or mine? I swear I’m not as messy as I was, Ki. You’ll be surprised to see how tidy I am right now.”

“Park,” the light brown haired one balks, “Let’s just go to the park.”

“But it will rain, don’t you think?”

“The last time I checked the sky is fine,”

The guy named Minhyuk juts his lower lip slightly, pointing outside with his chin. “Have a look, dear Sir.”

And Kihyun frowns, because Minhyuk is right. The sky is getting darker as if it’s going to be raining in anytime.

“Let’s just go to the park,” Kihyun looks at Minhyuk. “I need some air.”

“I know that cloudy sky is your favorite but you know how much I hate rain, though.. Can’t we just go to your place and catch up while, you know, just like how we used to do it.”

“Take it or not at all.”

“God. Fine, fine. You’re just as stubborn as you were. Nothing’s really change, huh?”

Silence is all Kihyun can offer to Minhyuk, though he’s sure that he saw the older rolled his eyes for once. And Kihyun is still at it, lips are kept shut, all silent when Minhyuk casually takes his hand to lead their way out to the park.

 

 

“I can’t do this. I can’t live without her, Min.. I really can’t.”

“Who says you can?”

The black haired man watches the younger’s eyes widen, seems to be surprised. Or confused, more likely so.

“But I can’t seem to live without you neither,”

“That, too, who says you can?” Minhyuk pauses, “It works for me as well. My life without you is miserable.”

“Said the one who claim himself as a neat and tidy people,” the light brown haired man mocks.

“Telling you so in case you want to come over,” the older talks back, slightly pouting. “But for real, though. I’m not as messy as I was, Ki.”

“You know it’s not like that, Min.. I—”

“We will get through this. Together. I know this sounds cliché and not as easy as it sounds, but we’ll get each other’s back just like the promise we have made, alright?”

“My mom doesn’t accept us, Minhyuk. God, she probably still doesn’t accept me.”

“Kihyun,” Minhyuk heaves a sigh, taking Kihyun’s hand on his. “We’ll get through this together, I promise. I won’t ever leave you—”

“You won’t ever?” Kihyun scoffs. “You did that already, Minhyuk. You weren’t there when my mom was pouring all of her anger she has been keeping these years. About my father, about me, about us. You weren’t there.”

Kihyun pulls away slightly, enough to break their gaze and their hands. He throws his gaze up, noticing that it’s probably about to rain in anytime soon.

“—Again. I was at fault, I know, and I’m really sorry. This promise, this one, I’m going to keep it for real.”

“No, Minhyuk. Us, is not going to happen again.”

“See? You’re just so stubborn I can’t even get the chance to explain this.”

“Then fucking explain this whole damn thing to me!” Kihyun snaps, causing both to be surprised. “Sorry.”

Minhyuk huffs, trying his luck to reach Kihyun’s hand. “It’s not like I wasn’t there for you back then. I had my hard times too, you know? And you know that I’m just as blunt as you are.. I was so afraid that my words are going to hurt you even more. I was so afraid to hurt you, Ki..”

“And you thought that by cutting everything off will get this thing solved? That’s too cruel. I was broken, and you made me broken more than I already was by leaving me all clueless. Thinking that you didn't even want to hear my voice. Nor even my texts.”

“I’m sorry,” Minhyuk voices up, a little shaky as his courage seems to be all gone so he only stares at his own hands that are holding one of Kihyun’s. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you need me the most. I’m sorry I couldn’t be good enough for you. I’m sorry for—”

“Shut up, will you?”

Minhyuk knows that tone, he clearly does. So he looks up, meeting Kihyun’s soft gaze.

“I’m sorry, Ki.. I really am.” He says as he gives Kihyun’s hand a gentle rub.

“I’m sorry, too. I was too afraid and too mad to even give you the chance to explain. I was at fault as well. I’m sorry..”

“It’s alright. Everything is fine now.. Right?”

“Minhyuk, no, why don’t you get it still?” Kihyun’s eyes flutter shut for a moment, looking frustrated. He lets out a sigh, shaking his head for once and mumbles, “I can’t,” almost desperately.

Minhyuk presses his lips together, forming a smile across his face. “You don’t want to lose the fight, Ki. You just simply don’t want to fight. I get it now.”

And the sky seems to know them very well as it finally pours all of its tears. Yes, it’s raining. Heavy enough to get them wet just in seconds.

Minhyuk hates how Kihyun knows him so damn well. How Kihyun understands him that he hates rain so much. And now Minhyuk just simply hates at how Kihyun suddenly hovers his palms over Minhyuk’s head, trying not to get the black haired man more wet than he already is.

“I didn’t really check the news weather, thinking it’s going to be all sunny during the day.” Kihyun says, busy squinting his eyes as he keeps looking at Minhyuk. “Go home, Minhyuk.”

“There is no home.” Minhyuk reaches Kihyun’s hand, holding and squeezing them lightly. “There never was.”

That has Kihyun’s mouth shut. He stays still, mind suddenly wanders somewhere, letting himself drown in Minhyuk’s beautiful eyes, not really aware of himself and his head are being wrapped with the coat Minhyuk was wearing.

“Remember to send my regards to your mother. I really hope you two are in a good term by now.”

“No, your coat, don’t have to—”

“Now, Kihyun, go home. Make yourself tea or something warm once you’re arrived. Call me,” he pauses, only to smile a little wider. “Now go. You’ll catch a cold.”

Kihyun doesn’t have the gut to answer. For some reason, Minhyuk, that exact tone he just used at him, and his smile; those always got him like an obedient puppy, so he says nothing, eyes on each other still.

Perhaps Kihyun doesn’t really have much choice served, so he decides to be the oh so stupid he is by bidding his farewell through his gaze, then excusing himself from the view.

Minhyuk might hate rain so much, but guess Minhyuk will hate himself more than he already is for not sending his beloved one properly. He might hate himself by now since all he does nothing. He’s still there, at least. Letting himself drenched, gaze is slightly blurred as the rain starts pouring harder, and cold starts to reach him.

He is there, still. Keeping his eyes at his beloved one’s back, until the figure is getting far, slowly fades, out of reach.

And all he can see is dark clouds.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, you have made it reaching this end notes woohoo please kindly let me know your thoughts about this messy and failed-miserably work of mine? I'll breathe through the reviews so I can do better in the future. Thank you for reading, nyways! Xx


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